1. Anonymous said: No way that little piece of fruit is good looking. You're ridiculously handsome.


    I am many things, but I don’t think I could ever out-handsome a hybrid fruit. Those things are just inherently awesome.


  2. I don’t have florals, but I have food

    which is pretty like flowers, except you can also eat it


    here’s your birthday dinner and selfie, hydroangos

    I’m gonna eat it now, sorry


  3. This beer is actually uh-may-zingg, but until they invent some way for it to let out a little scream every time you open one, I won’t be 100% satisfied


  4. I’m turning 24 in a week, and apparently the most grievous of my adolescent rebellions is sneaking out for iced tea


  5. But first, let me take a selfie


  6. This is my “I’m too tired and out-of- it to read the things that I need to read” face

    it’s not a good face


  7. Brock just noticed that the tag on my shirt mentions that it’s made out of dad material


  8. Such a rebel


  9. Me and the wife. #throwbackthursday


  10. Ready to geek out!


  11. Ancient Hawaiians say: bourbon before bourbon before gin before gin before tequila before gin is probably an unwise decision.


  12. I feel like we should be in a buddy cop movie or something. ‘Hawaii 5-0…0’


  13. Awk


  14. Ancient Hawaiians say: “Never eat the coconut you find in the dark.”


  15. #tbt to Caroline’s Sweet 16 because I looked good for once. Definitely pulled off the bowtie/suspenders. Matt Smith knows what looks good.